The Joke thread

[zepboy]

Don't forget that guns are cheaper!!! LOL

[CygnusX1]

****TICK WARNING****


I hate it when people forward bogus warnings... but this one is real,
and it is important.

This is the time of year to think of ticks once again.

If someone comes to your front door saying they are checking for ticks
due to the warm weather, and asks you to take your clothes off and
dance around with your arms up...

DO NOT DO IT!!!

THIS IS A SCAM!!

They only want to see you naked.

I wish I'd gotten this notification yesterday.



I feel so stupid...

[zepboy]

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
SNARF . . . PUKE . . . ROFLMBO!!!

[CygnusX1]

YOU DA MAN Zep.

Here ya go:


A guy walks into a bar, sits down, and asks:

"Bartender, got any specials today?"

Bartender dude answers, "Yes, as a matter of fact we have a new drink-
invented by a Gynecologist-Doctor-type patron of ours. It's a mix of
Pabst Blue Ribbon Beer and Smirnoff Vodka."

The guy asks, "Good grief, what do you call that?"

The bartender replied.....


"It's the "Pabst Smir."

[Walkinghairball]

BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOoooooooooooooooooo!

The Ref takes a point away.


Actually it is a good one, I'm just goofin on ya bro.

[CygnusX1]

BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOoooooooooooooooooo!

The Ref takes a point away.


Actually it is a good one, I'm just goofin on ya bro.

you ain't right Hairy.

hope it's all good your way Bruthaman.

[Walkinghairball]

Yeah, a little tired from the let's see.............12 hours monday, 10.5 yesterday, and today is CORP day and I might be one guy down in the warehouse.

At least I'm not SPENDING any money.

[CygnusX1]

Yeah, a little tired from the let's see.............12 hours monday, 10.5 yesterday, and today is CORP day and I might be one guy down in the warehouse.

At least I'm not SPENDING any money.

true, and Friday's comin' too! Git 'r' Done!

[Big Blue Owl]

Hiya, fellas!

-----------------------

A little kid walks into a city bus and sits right behind the driver and starts yelling, "If my dad was a bull and my mom a cow I'd be a little bull."

The driver starts getting mad at the noisy kid, who continues with, "If my dad was an elephant and my mom a girl elephant I would be a little elephant."

The kid goes on with several animals until the bus driver gets angry and yells at the kid, "What if your dad was gay and your mom was a prostitute?!"

The kid smiles and says, "I would be a bus driver!"

[CygnusX1]

^^^

oh SNAP that sounds about right! Good one!

Hey BBO! Rock ON wit'chabadself.

[Big Blue Owl]

Rockin, Cyg. I'm on a vacation day, but still at work sorting 'em out and hangin at By-tor. I think I need a shrink (and a drink.)

[CygnusX1]

I think I need a shrink (and a drink.)

I do too Brudda, and not necessarily in that order.

Have a good day off dude!

Thought of the Day:

We know exactly where one cow with mad-cow-disease is located among
millions and millions of cows in America, but we haven't got a clue as to
where millions of illegal immigrants and terrorists are located....

Maybe we should put the Department of Agriculture in charge of immigration, huh?

[awip2062]

Due to recent budget cuts and the rising cost of electricity, gas, and oil, the light at the end of the tunnel has been turned off.

We apologize for the inconvenience.

[Walkinghairball]

A few new "Yer Mama" jokes I heard recently.


"Yer mama so fat she sweats mayonaise..............we call her "Miracle hips."


And, "Yer mama a dyslexic prostitute........she will duck your sick for $25.00."

[CygnusX1]

Due to recent budget cuts and the rising cost of electricity, gas, and oil, the light at the end of the tunnel has been turned off.

We apologize for the inconvenience.

Ah we KNEW that was coming! hahahaha