The Joke thread

schuette · Post by **schuette** » Thu Mar 16, 2006 9:27 am

LOL!!

Walkinghairball · Post by **Walkinghairball** » Thu Mar 16, 2006 9:31 am

A lion, a gorilla, and a chicken are having drinks at the local bar.

After a few rounds....................... the boasting starts.

The lion say's, "I'm the king of the jungle. When I ROAR everything runs away in terror."

The gorilla, not to be out done say's, "No, I'm the king of the jungle. When I get to POUNDING MY CHEST, everything runs away in terror."

The chicken is silent.

The lion and gorilla both look to the chicken for it's boast.

The chicken then say's, "ROARING.................POUNDING THE CHEST"....."PAH!"
"When I SNEEZE..................10 million people shit themselves.

CygnusX1 · Post by **CygnusX1** » Thu Mar 16, 2006 10:52 am

tre' cool

lol

CygnusX1 · Post by **CygnusX1** » Thu Mar 16, 2006 11:11 am

Brokeback Mountain Supply List

WEEK ONE

* Beans
* Bacon
* Coffee
* Whiskey

WEEK TWO

* Beans
* Ham
* Coffee
* Whiskey

WEEK THREE

* Beans al fresca
* Thin-sliced Bacon
* Hazelnut Coffee
* Sky vodka & Tanqueray gin
* K-Y gel

WEEK FOUR

* Beans en salade
* Pancetta
* Coffee (espresso grind)
* 5-6 bottles best Chardonnay
* 2 tubes K-Y gel

WEEK FIVE

* Fresh Fava beans
* Jasmine rice
* Prosciutto, approx. 8 ounces, thinly sliced
* Medallions of veal
* Porcini mushrooms
* 1/2 pint of heavy whipping cream
* 1 Cub Scout uniform, size 42 long
* 5-6 bottles French Bordeaux (Estate Reserve)
* 1 extra large bottle Astro-glide

WEEK SIX

* Yukon Gold potatoes
* Heavy whipping cream
* Asparagus (very thin)
* Organic Eggs
* Spanish Lemons
* Gruyere cheese (well aged)
* Crushed Walnuts
* Arugula
* Clarified Butter
* Extra Virgin Olive oil
* Pure Balsamic vinegar
* 6 yards white silk organdy
* 6 yards pale ivory taffeta
* 3 Cases of Dom Perignon Masters Reserve
* Large tin Crisco

awip2062 · Post by **awip2062** » Thu Mar 16, 2006 11:46 am

CygnusX1 · Post by **CygnusX1** » Thu Mar 16, 2006 1:32 pm

schuette · Post by **schuette** » Thu Mar 16, 2006 4:39 pm

that was funny siggy

CygnusX1 · Post by **CygnusX1** » Fri Mar 17, 2006 5:55 am

yeah...it WAS wasn't it? it'll ruffle some feathers, but hey....you gotta laff

CygnusX1 · Post by **CygnusX1** » Fri Mar 17, 2006 11:33 am

If Arabs take control of US seaports.....What's NEXT??

Here's what:

Hey...IT COULD HAPPEN!!

schuette · Post by **schuette** » Fri Mar 17, 2006 3:39 pm

hahahahaha

CygnusX1 · Post by **CygnusX1** » Tue Mar 21, 2006 3:22 pm

I was on the side of interstate changing a tire one day, and someone pulls in behind my vehicle, gets out, and proceeds to ask me the dumbest question:

"Hey dude! You have a flat?" (Ugh...I'm stoked now)

I responded in kind: "No a*shole, I rotate my tires every 3000 miles, no matter WHERE-THE-HELL I'm at!"

....and people wonder why I drink!

awip2062 · Post by **awip2062** » Tue Mar 21, 2006 3:43 pm

Why DO you drink, Siggs?

schuette · Post by **schuette** » Tue Mar 21, 2006 5:40 pm

There's a question!

CygnusX1 · Post by **CygnusX1** » Wed Mar 22, 2006 5:43 am

it eases the overwhelming urge to choke the life outta idiots

just kiddin'....don't drink much at all...this is a JOKE thread, right?

jus' checkin'.....

awip2062 · Post by **awip2062** » Wed Mar 22, 2006 11:46 am

I think Spandex was invented as a joke.